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We can learn not to get hooked into unhealthy behaviors in relationships –
behaviors such as care taking, controlling, discounting ourselves, and
believing lies.
We can learn to identify hooks, and choose not to allow ourselves to be fooled.
Often, people do things with or without knowing it that pull us into a series
of self-defeating behaviors we call codependency. Sometimes these hooks
can be deliberate.
Someone may hint or sigh about a problem, thinking or hoping that hint or sigh
will hook us into taking care of him or her. That's manipulation.
When people hint and sigh about something, then coyly say, "Oh, never mind,
that's not for you to worry about," that's a game. We're about to get sucked
in, if we allow that to happen.
Our strong point is that we care allot. Our weak point is that we often
underestimate the people with whom we're dealing. It is time we give up our
naïve assumption that people don't follow agendas of their own in their best
interest.
We also want to look at ourselves. Do we give hooks, looks, hints, hoping to
hook another? We need to insist that we behave in a direct and honest
manner with others.
If someone wants something from us, insist that the person ask us directly
for it. Require the same from ourselves.
http://wrhmcp.ecrater.com/
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