EXPECTATIONS:

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It is our job to identify our needs, and then determine a balanced
way of getting those needs met.

It is unreasonable to expect anyone to be able or willing to meet our
every request. We are responsible for asking for what we want and
need. It's the other person's responsibility to freely choose whether
or not to respond to our request.

It is unreasonable and unhealthy to expect one person to be the
source for meeting all our needs. Ultimately, we will become angry
and resentful, maybe even punishing, toward that person for not
supporting us as we expected.

It is reasonable to have certain and well-defined expectations of
our spouse, children, and friends.

If a person cannot or will not be there for us, then we need to take
responsibility for ourselves in that relationship. We may need to set
a boundary, alter our expectations, or change the limits of the
relationship to accommodate that person's unavailability.

It is reasonable to sprinkle our wants and needs around and to be
realistic about how much we ask or expect of any particular person.

The issue of expectations goes back to knowing that we are
responsible for identifying our needs, believing they deserve to get
met, and discover an appropriate, satisfactory way to do that in our
life.

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