GOSSIP:

~

Intimacy is that warm gift of feeling connected to others and enjoying
our connection to them.

As we grow in recovery, we find that gift in many, sometimes
surprising places.

Intimacy is not sex, although sex can be intimate. Intimacy means
mutually honest, warm, caring, safe relationships – relationships
where both people are valued.

Sometimes there are troublesome feelings to work through.
Sometimes the boundaries or parameters of relationships change.
But there is a bond.

There are many blocks to intimate relationships. Addictions and
abuse, unresolved family of origin issues, controlling, off balance
relationships, where there is too great a discrepancy in power, care
taking, nagging, withdrawing, and shutting down can hurt intimacy.

So can a simple behavior like gossip – for example, to discuss
another person's issues, shortcomings, or failures with someone else
will have a predictable negative impact on the relationship.

That does not mean we walk around with our heads in the clouds; it
means we strive to keep our motives clean when it comes to
discussing other people.

If we have a serious issue with someone, the best way to resolve it
is to bring the issue to that person.

Direct, clean conversation clears the air and paves the way for
intimacy.

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