LOVE:

~

Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work;
sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the
other person was unavailable or refused to participate.

To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too
hard. This may mask the situation for a while, but we usually get
tired. Then, when we stop doing all the work, we notice there is no
relationship.

Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It
is self-defeating and relationship-defeating. It creates the illusion of
a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables
the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share.

In our best relationships, we all have temporary periods where one
person participates more than the other. This is normal. But as a
permanent way of participating in relationships, it leaves us feeling
tired, worn out, needy, and angry.

We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, then let the
relationship find it's own life. Are we doing all the initiating?

We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be. We do
not help that process by trying to control it.

Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen.

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