SHAME:

~

Many of us were victimized, sometimes more than once. We may
have been physically abused, sexually abused, or exploited by the
addictions of another.

Understand that if another person has abused us, it is not cause for
us to feel shame. The guilt for the act of abuse belongs to the
perpetrator, not the victim.

One of the goals of recovery is learning self-care, learning to free
ourselves from victimization, and not to blame ourselves for past
experiences.

We each have our own work, our issues, our recovery tasks. One of
those tasks is to stop pointing our finger at the perpetrator, because
it distracts us. Although we hold each person responsible and
accountable for his or her behavior, we learn compassion for the
perpetrator. We understand that many forces have come into play
in that person's life.

We learn to understand the role we played in our victimization, how
we fell into that role and did not rescue ourselves. But that is
information to arm us so that it need not happen again.

Let go of victim shame. We have issues and tasks, but our issue is
not to feel guilty and wrong because we have been victimized.

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