BOUNDRIES:

~

We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another
person’s feelings. It’s impossible; the two acts contradict.

What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others! How
difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!

It’s good to care about other people and their feelings, it’s essential
to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good care of
ourselves, we need to make a choice.

Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our family,
or our church, about never hurting other people’s feelings. We can
replace that message with a new one, one that says it’s not okay to
hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we take care of ourselves, others
will react with hurt feelings.

That’s okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the experience;
they will too. The most powerful and positive impact we can have
on other people is accomplished by taking responsibility for
ourselves, and allowing others to be responsible for themselves.

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