FAMILY ISSUES:

We can draw a healthy line, a healthy
boundary, between ourselves and our

nuclear family. We can separate
ourselves from their issues.

Some of us may have family
members who are addicted to alcohol
and other drugs and who are not in
recovery from their addiction.

Some of us may have family members
who have unresolved codependency
issues. Family members may be
addicted to misery, pain, suffering,
martyrdom, and victimization.

We may have family members who
are addicted to work, eating, or sex.
Our family may be completely
enmeshed, or we may have a
disconnected family in which the
members have little contact.

We may be like our family. We may
love our family. But we are separate
human beings with individual rights
and issues. One of our primary rights
is to begin feeling better and
recovering, whether or not others in
the family choose to do the same.

Often when we begin taking care of
ourselves, family members will
reverberate with overt and covert
attempts to pull us back into the old
system and roles. We do not have to
go. Their attempts to pull us back
are their issues. Taking care of
ourselves and becoming healthy
and happy does not mean we do not
love them. It means we're
addressing our issues.

We do not have to judge them
because they have issues; nor do
we have to allow them to do
anything they would like to us just
because they are family.

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