REVENGE:

No matter how long we've been
recovering, we may still feel an
overwhelming desire at times to
punish, or get even, with another
person.

Those are normal feelings, but we do
not have to act on them. These
feelings are part of our anger but it's
not our job to deal justice.

We can allow ourselves to feel the
anger. It is helpful to go one step
deeper and let ourselves feel the
other feelings – the hurt, the pain, the
anguish. But our goal is to release the
feelings.

We can hold the other person
accountable. We can hold the other
person responsible. But it is not our
responsibility to be judge and jury.

Walk away. Stop playing the game.
Unhook. Learn your lesson. Thank
the other person for having taught
you something valuable. And be
finished with it.

Acceptance helps. So does
forgiveness – not the kind that
invites that person to use us again,
but a forgiveness that releases the
other person and sets him or her free
to walk a separate path.

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