SHAME:

Many of us were victimized, sometimes more
than once. We may have been physically
abused, sexually abused, or exploited by the
addictions of another.

Understand that if another person has abused
us, it is not cause for us to feel shame. The
guilt for the act of abuse belongs to the
perpetrator, not the victim.

One of the goals of recovery is learning
self-care, learning to free ourselves from
victimization, and not to blame ourselves for
past experiences.

We each have our own work, our issues, our
recovery tasks. One of those tasks is to stop
pointing our finger at the perpetrator, because
it distracts us. Although we hold each person
responsible and accountable for his or her

behavior, we learn compassion for the
perpetrator. We understand that many forces
have come into play in that person's life.

We learn to understand the role we played in
our victimization, how we fell into that role
and did not rescue ourselves. But that is
information to arm us so that it need not
happen again.

Let go of victim shame. We have issues and
tasks, but our issue is not to feel guilty and
wrong because we have been victimized.

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