COMPETITION:

"Yes, I know your spouse is an alcoholic,
but my son is an alcoholic, and that's
different. That's worse!"

What an easy trap that can be for us. We
are out to show others how victimized
we have been, how much we hurt, how
unfair life is, and what a tremendous

martyr we are. And we won't be happy
until we do!

The goal in recovery is not to show
others how much we hurt or have hurt.
The goal is to stop our pain, and to share
that solution with others.

If we find ourselves trying to prove to
someone how much we've been hurt or
if we try to top someone else's pain, we
may want to stop and figure out what's

going on. Do we need to recognize how
much we've hurt or are hurting?

There is no particular award or reward
for suffering, as many of us tricked

ourselves into believing in the height of
our codependency. The reward is

learning to stop the pain and move into
joy, peace, and fulfillment.

That is the gift of recovery, and it is
equally available to each of us, even

if our pain was greater, or less, than
someone else's.

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