FEELINGS:

Feelings of hurt or anger can be some of the
most difficult to face. We can feel so
vulnerable, frightened, and powerless when
these feelings appear.

Sometimes, to gain a sense of control, we may
punish the people around us, whether they are
people we blame for these feelings or innocent
bystanders. We may try to "get even," or we
may manipulate behind people's backs to gain
a sense of power over the situation.

Feeling hurt does not have to be so frightening.
We do not have to work so hard to avoid it.
While hurt feelings aren't as much fun as
feeling happy, they are, still, just feelings.

We can surrender to them, feel them, and go
on. Emotional pain does not have to devastate
us. We can sit still, feel the pain, figure out if
there's something we need to do to take care
of ourselves, and then go on with our life.

We do not have to act in haste; we do not
have to punish others to get control over our
feelings. We can begin sharing our hurt
feelings with others. That brings relief and
often healing to them and to us.

Eventually, we learn the lesson that real
power comes from allowing ourselves to be
vulnerable enough to feel hurt. Real power
comes from knowing we can take care of
ourselves, even when we feel emotional
pain. Real power comes when we stop
holding others responsible for our pain, and
we take responsibility for all our feelings.

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