BAD HABITS:

We can learn not to get hooked into unhealthy behaviors
in relationships – behaviors such as care taking, controlling,
discounting ourselves, and believing lies.

We can learn to identify hooks, and choose not to allow
ourselves to be fooled.

Often, people do things with or without knowing it that pull
us into a series of self-defeating behaviors we call
codependency. Sometimes these hooks can be deliberate.

Someone may hint or sigh about a problem, thinking or
hoping that hint or sigh will hook us into taking care of him
or her. That's manipulation.

When people hint and sigh about something, then coyly say,
"Oh, never mind, that's not for you to worry about," that's a
game. We're about to get sucked in, if we allow that to happen.

Our strong point is that we care allot. Our weak point is that
we often underestimate the people with whom we're dealing.
It is time we give up our naïve assumption that people don't
follow agendas of their own in their best interest.

We also want to look at ourselves. Do we give hooks, looks,
hints, hoping to hook another? We need to insist that we
behave in a direct and honest manner with others.

If someone wants something from us, insist that the person
ask us directly for it. Require the same from ourselves.

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