BOUNDARIES:

We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care
of another person’s feelings. It’s impossible; the two acts
contradict.

What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others!
How difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!

It’s good to care about other people and their feelings, it’s
essential to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good
care of ourselves, we need to make a choice.

Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our
family, or our church, about never hurting other people’s
feelings. We can replace that message with a new one, one
that says it’s not okay to hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we
take care of ourselves, others will react with hurt feelings.

That’s okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the
experience; they will too. The most powerful and positive
impact we can have on other people is accomplished by
taking responsibility for ourselves, and allowing others to be

responsible for themselves.

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