FAMILY ISSUES:

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We can draw a healthy line, a healthy boundary, between ourselves
and our nuclear family. We can separate ourselves from their issues.

Some of us may have family members who are addicted to alcohol
and other drugs and who are not in recovery from their addiction.

Some of us may have family members who have unresolved
codependency issues. Family members may be addicted to misery,
pain, suffering, martyrdom, and victimization.

We may have family members who are addicted to work, eating, or
sex. Our family may be completely enmeshed, or we may have a
disconnected family in which the members have little contact.

We may be like our family. We may love our family. But we are
separate human beings with individual rights and issues. One of our
primary rights is to begin feeling better and recovering, whether or
not others in the family choose to do the same.

Often when we begin taking care of ourselves, family members will
reverberate with overt and covert attempts to pull us back into the
old system and roles. We do not have to go. Their attempts to pull
us back are their issues. Taking care of ourselves and becoming
healthy and happy does not mean we do not love them. It means
we're addressing our issues.

We do not have to judge them because they have issues; nor do we
have to allow them to do anything they would like to us just because
they are family.

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