BAD HABITS:

We can learn not to get hooked into unhealthy
behaviors in relationships – behaviors such as
care taking, controlling, discounting ourselves,
and believing lies.

We can learn to identify hooks, and choose not
to allow ourselves to be fooled.

Often, people do things with or without
knowing it that pull us into a series of
self-defeating behaviors we call codependency.
Sometimes these hooks can be deliberate.

Someone may hint or sigh about a problem,
thinking or hoping that hint or sigh will hook us
into taking care of him or her. That's
manipulation.

When people hint and sigh about something,
then coyly say, "Oh, never mind, that's not for
you to worry about," that's a game. We're
about to get sucked in, if we allow that to
happen.

Our strong point is that we care allot. Our
weak point is that we often underestimate the
people with whom we're dealing. It is time we
give up our naïve assumption that people don't
follow agendas of their own in their best
interest.

We also want to look at ourselves. Do we give
hooks, looks, hints, hoping to hook another?
We need to insist that we behave in a direct
and honest manner with others.

If someone wants something from us, insist that
the person ask us directly for it. Require the
same from ourselves.

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