FEELINGS:

Feelings of hurt or anger can be some of the most difficult
to face. We can feel so vulnerable, frightened, and
powerless when these feelings appear.

Sometimes, to gain a sense of control, we may punish the
people around us, whether they are people we blame for
these feelings or innocent bystanders. We may try to "get
even," or we may manipulate behind people's backs to
gain a sense of power over the situation.

Feeling hurt does not have to be so frightening. We do not
have to work so hard to avoid it. While hurt feelings aren't
as much fun as feeling happy, they are, still, just feelings.

We can surrender to them, feel them, and go on.
Emotional pain does not have to devastate us. We can sit
still, feel the pain, figure out if there's something we need
to do to take care of ourselves, and then go on with our

life.

We do not have to act in haste; we do not have to punish
others to get control over our feelings. We can begin
sharing our hurt feelings with others. That brings relief and
often healing to them and to us.

Eventually, we learn the lesson that real power comes from
allowing ourselves to be vulnerable enough to feel hurt.
Real power comes from knowing we can take care of
ourselves, even when we feel emotional pain. Real power
comes when we stop holding others responsible for our
pain, and we take responsibility for all our feelings.

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