GOSSIP:

Intimacy is that warm gift of feeling connected to
others and enjoying our connection to them.

As we grow in recovery, we find that gift in many,
sometimes surprising places.

Intimacy is not sex, although sex can be intimate.
Intimacy means mutually honest, warm, caring,
safe relationships – relationships where both
people are valued.

Sometimes there are troublesome feelings to
work through. Sometimes the boundaries or
parameters of relationships change. But there is a
bond.

There are many blocks to intimate relationships.
Addictions and abuse, unresolved family of
origin issues, controlling, off balance relationships,
where there is too great a discrepancy in power,
care taking, nagging, withdrawing, and shutting
down can hurt intimacy.

So can a simple behavior like gossip – for
example, to discuss another person's issues,
shortcomings, or failures with someone else will
have a predictable negative impact on the
relationship.

That does not mean we walk around with our
heads in the clouds; it means we strive to keep
our motives clean when it comes to discussing
other people.

If we have a serious issue with someone, the best
way to resolve it is to bring the issue to that
person.

Direct, clean conversation clears the air and
paves the way for intimacy.

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