ACCEPTANCE:

One of the most frustrating stages of acceptance is
the bargaining stage. In denial, there is bliss. In
anger, there is some sense of power. In bargaining,
we vacillate between believing there is something we
can do to change things and realizing there isn't .

There are stories about attempts to bargain with the
alcoholic's drinking: "If I keep the house cleaner, he
won't drink … If I buy my son a new car, he'll stop
using drugs."

We do big, small, and in-between things, sometimes
crazy things, to ward off, stop, or stall the pain
involved with accepting reality.

There is no substitute for accepting reality. That's our
goal. But along the way, we may try to strike a deal.
Recognizing our attempts at bargaining for what they
are – part of the grief process – helps our lives
become manageable.

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