GOSSIP:

Intimacy is that warm gift of
feeling connected to others
and enjoying our connection
to them.

As we grow in recovery, we
find that gift in many,
sometimes surprising places.

Intimacy is not sex, although
sex can be intimate. Intimacy
means mutually honest, warm,
caring, safe relationships
– relationships where both
people are valued.

Sometimes there are
troublesome feelings to work
through. Sometimes the

boundaries or parameters of
relationships change. But
there is a bond.

There are many blocks to
intimate relationships.
Addictions and abuse,

unresolved family of origin
issues, controlling, off
balance relationships,

where there is too great a
discrepancy in power, care
taking, nagging, withdrawing,
and shutting down can hurt
intimacy.

So can a simple behavior like
gossip – for example, to
discuss another person's issues,
shortcomings, or failures with
someone else will have a

predictable negative impact on
the relationship.

That does not mean we walk
around with our heads in the
clouds; it means we strive to
keep our motives clean when
it comes to discussing other
people.

If we have a serious issue with
someone, the best way to
resolve it is to bring the issue
to that person.

Direct, clean conversation
clears the air and paves the
way for intimacy.

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