COMPETITION:

"Yes, I know your spouse is an alcoholic, but my son is an alcoholic,
and that's different. That's worse!"

What an easy trap that can be for us. We are out to show others
how victimized we have been, how much we hurt, how unfair life is,
and what a tremendous martyr we are. And we won't be happy
until we do!

The goal in recovery is not to show others how much we hurt or
have hurt. The goal is to stop our pain, and to share that solution
with others.

If we find ourselves trying to prove to someone how much we've
been hurt or if we try to top someone else's pain, we may want to
stop and figure out what's going on. Do we need to recognize how
much we've hurt or are hurting?

There is no particular award or reward for suffering, as many of us
tricked ourselves into believing in the height of our codependency.
The reward is learning to stop the pain and move into joy, peace,
and fulfillment.

That is the gift of recovery, and it is equally available to each of us,
even if our pain was greater, or less, than someone else's.

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