EXPECTATIONS:

It is our job to identify our needs, and
then determine a balanced way of

getting those needs met.

It is unreasonable to expect anyone to
be able or willing to meet our every

request. We are responsible for asking
for what we want and need. It's the

other person's responsibility to freely
choose whether or not to respond to

our request.

It is unreasonable and unhealthy to
expect one person to be the source
for meeting all our needs. Ultimately,
we will become angry and resentful,
maybe even punishing, toward that
person for not supporting us as we
expected.

It is reasonable to have certain and
well-defined expectations of our
spouse, children, and friends.

If a person cannot or will not be there
for us, then we need to take
responsibility for ourselves in that
relationship. We may need to set a

boundary, alter our expectations, or
change the limits of the relationship
to accommodate that person's
unavailability.

It is reasonable to sprinkle our wants
and needs around and to be realistic

about how much we ask or expect of
any particular person.

The issue of expectations goes back to
knowing that we are responsible for

identifying our needs, believing they
deserve to get met, and discover an

appropriate, satisfactory way to do that
in our life.

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