BAD HABITS:

We can learn not to get hooked into
unhealthy behaviors in relationships –

behaviors such as care taking,
controlling, discounting ourselves,
and believing lies.

We can learn to identify hooks, and
choose not to allow ourselves to be
fooled.

Often, people do things with or
without knowing it that pull us into a
series of self-defeating behaviors we
call codependency. Sometimes these
hooks can be deliberate.

Someone may hint or sigh about a
problem, thinking or hoping that hint
or sigh will hook us into taking care
of him or her. That's manipulation.

When people hint and sigh about
something, then coyly say, "Oh, never
mind, that's not for you to worry
about," that's a game. We're about to
get sucked in, if we allow that to
happen.

Our strong point is that we care allot.
Our weak point is that we often

underestimate the people with whom
we're dealing. It is time we give up
our naïve assumption that people don't
follow agendas of their own in their
best interest.

We also want to look at ourselves. Do
we give hooks, looks, hints, hoping to

hook another? We need to insist that
we behave in a direct and honest
manner with others.

If someone wants something from us,
insist that the person ask us directly for

it. Require the same from ourselves.

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